If the Mute Button Could Talk
Must you hold up both middle fingers to the speaker that the Talk button and I share? Just because I don’t have eyes doesn’t mean I don’t know what you’re doing. It’s rude. No, it’s beyond rude. It’s abusive.
Read MoreRomantic Semantics
Not everyone makes a point of baking cupcakes together, is what I’m saying.
Read MoreSerenade This
They say love makes you crazy. And indeed, popular love songs essentially are the musical score to sociopathic behavior.
Read More2014's Greatest Hits
No one said you could have it all. And certainly nothing really ever turns out quite the way you think it will.
Read MoreThe Mature Adult's Guide to Anger Management (Doesn't Exist).
From where you stood by the bar on the the west side of the room, the glassware would take a satisfyingly long flight before its explosive and cathartic termination upon the brick wall.
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